This study was conducted to understand the characteristics of resilience that appeared in the child-rearing process and the life of single mother by exploring the essence and meaning of child-rearing experience in single mothers who had high resilience. Based on this, the purpose of this study was to present the basic data necessary for counseling intervention and family counseling for helping the child rearing of single mother.
The participants in this study were single mothers whose total score exceeded 195 points, average score of Korean adults in Kim Juhwan (2011)’s resilience test: i.e. 10 mothers who were rearing their child(ren) aged 6 ≤ and < 18 years in Korean age although they had an infant or adult child. Data collection was proceeded through 1-2 depth interviews from July to November, 2018. Applying Giorgi’s phenomenological research method, the data collected were analyzed with the situational structure describing the unique and individual characteristics of individual research participant and the general structure integrating this into the whole.
As a result of analysis, the child-rearing experience of research participants was drawn into a total of 9 components and 22 subcomponents. The components appeared as ‘select children with a broken heart’, ‘take responsibility for living by overcoming tough reality’, ‘take care of oneself’, ‘look at life with positive views’, ‘ruminate on unforgettable memories with children’, ‘empathize, communicate and exchange help’, ‘teach children so that they can heal wounded hearts and push through life’, ‘rely on the power of religion’, and ‘balance between solidarity and separation.’
Based on the components as shown above, the child-rearing experience of research participants can be summarized and described as follows:
First, participants experienced wounds and anguish before and after they became a single parent. The components appeared as ‘select children with a broken heart’ and ‘take responsibility for living by overcoming tough reality.’ Participants chose divorce or remained as an unmarried mother when their relationship with husband or cohabitant intensified to the point of collapse. In this process, participants showed a strong will toward child rearing. Later their relationship with friends or family members was disconnected or they caused friends or family members trouble as they were economically supported by them. On the other hand, children remembered their father negatively or suffered from the lack of father itself and were sometimes stigmatized as ‘child without father’ by people around them. In addition, participants became the head of the household and received the basic living security or had to work late at night to earn insufficient living expenses. Children left alone at home had to wait for their mother endlessly for consecutive days.
Second, participants were rearing children with individual’s internal, relational, behavioral, and spiritual characteristics by exerting resilience despite many difficulties and suffering.
Participants’ individual internal characteristics appeared as these components: ‘take care of oneself’ and ‘look at life with positive views.’ Participants controlled stress by taking an exercise or talking to oneself and lived a life with the opportunity for growth by obtaining a certificate with money and time invested into themselves. In addition, they saw future optimistically, were satisfied with the present every life, and had courage to overcome any difficulties.
Participants’ relational characteristics appeared as these components: ‘ruminate on unforgettable memories with children’ and ‘empathize, communicate, and exchange help.’ Participants were living, recalling the moments when they were sorry or thankful endlessly to children every moment. Moreover, participants had a sympathetic conversation from the children’s points of view, communicated with thankful mind to others, and became a good role model for children by doing voluntary service.
Participants’ behavioral characteristics appeared as this component: ‘teach children so that they can heal wounded hearts and push through life.’ Participants reflected on what they lacked as a mother when a problem occurred to their child and accepted their child’s problems as they were and dealt with the problems by making them receive counseling and drug therapy. In addition, participants trained their children to develop good living habits and taught a sense of economy so that their children could live on their own.
Participants’ spiritual characteristics appeared as this component: ‘rely on the power of religion.’ Participants prayed to a supreme being for themselves and their children if they had a hard time. The difficulty facing them was perceived as the thing that could be overcome in a religion and in that way, their fears could be overcome.
Third, participants experienced becoming a complete family when they became a single-parent family with children. This appeared as this component: ‘balance between solidarity and separation.’ Participants had a profound bond in emotional solidarity with children and children became self-reliant and did all on their own in learning or career decision.
Such child-rearing experience of single mother with high resilience appeared as this component: ‘become a complete family with children by exerting resilience under suffering and tough reality.’
This study is noteworthy in that it shed a deep light on the child-rearing experience of single mother with high resilience from the inner perspective and identified closely how mother’s resilience appeared in the child-rearing process through phenomenological research method.
It was revealed that what had an important impact on adaptation and growth of children in single mother was mother factor and resilience, the main factor enabled mother to endure the difficulties that they faced and overcome these and even contributed positively to child rearing.
Accordingly, this study can be used to inform the importance of resilience at parent education or counseling for single mother, utilized as guideline for effective child rearing, and provided as the basic data for developing resilience improvement program.


Keywords : single mother, child rearing, resilience, phenomenological study